The Concept of the “Work Wife” in Chinese Society

Alex Lew, CFA
5 min readMar 25, 2023

--

In China, the “work wife” concept has become a popular topic of discussion in recent years. This term describes a close, platonic relationship between a male and a female colleague akin to a marriage. The two individuals share a strong bond often characterised by high emotional intimacy and mutual support. However, this relationship is purely platonic, and there is no romantic or sexual element to it.

The Concept of a working wife in China has its roots in traditional gender roles and expectations. Historically, women were expected to be the primary caregivers and homemakers, while men were expected to be the breadwinners. However, with the rise of women in the workforce in China, many women can now balance work and family responsibilities. This has led to the development of the work-wife phenomenon, where female colleagues offer emotional support and companionship to their male counterparts in the workplace.

In this article, we will explore the Concept of the work wife in China in greater detail, looking at the historical and cultural context that gave rise to it, the benefits and drawbacks of this kind of relationship, and the role it plays in contemporary Chinese society.

Historical and cultural context

The Concept of the work wife in China can be traced back to traditional gender roles and expectations. Historically, women in China were expected to be the primary caregivers and homemakers, responsible for raising children and caring for the household. Conversely, men were expected to be the breadwinners, providing for their families and working outside the home.

However, with the rise of women in the workforce in China, these gender roles and expectations have shifted. Many women can now balance work and family responsibilities, taking on roles and responsibilities that were once the exclusive domain of men. This has led to a blurring of traditional gender roles, with women playing a more active role in the workplace and men taking on more domestic responsibilities.

The Concept of the work wife in China emerged due to these changing gender roles and expectations. Male colleagues used to have a wife at home to provide emotional support, and companionship needed more in this area when they spent long hours at work. Female colleagues were able to fill this emotional void, offering friendship and support to their male counterparts.

Benefits of the work-wife relationship

The work-wife relationship offers several benefits to both parties involved. For men, having a working wife provides emotional support and companionship, which can be particularly important in high-stress work environments. It also allows them to maintain a work-life balance by having someone to talk to and confide in during work hours.

For women, the work-wife relationship offers a chance to form close bonds with male colleagues in a spiritual, non-threatening way. It also allows them to understand better their male colleagues’ perspectives, which can benefit the workplace.

The work-wife relationship can also benefit the workplace as a whole by fostering a sense of camaraderie and teamwork among colleagues. When colleagues feel supported and valued, they are more likely to be engaged and productive.

Drawbacks of the work-wife relationship

Despite the benefits, the work-wife relationship also has its drawbacks. One potential issue is that it can be seen as reinforcing traditional gender roles and expectations, with women taking on the emotional labour of providing support and companionship to their male colleagues. This can lead to resentment and frustration among female colleagues who feel they are expected to take on this role.

Another potential issue is that the work-wife relationship can be seen as a form of emotional infidelity, mainly if one or both parties are in a romantic relationship outside work. This can lead to jealousy and conflict, both in and out of work.

The work-wife relationship can also be problematic if it creates a sense of exclusivity or cliquishness within the workplace. If a male colleague is perceived to have a closer relationship with his work wife than with other colleagues, this can lead to feelings of exclusion and tension within the team.

Additionally, there is a risk that the work-wife relationship can become too emotionally intense, leading to a blurring of boundaries between work and personal life. This can be particularly problematic if one or both parties struggle with personal issues or the relationship becomes overly dependent on one another.

Contemporary Context and changing attitudes

As China modernises and shifts away from traditional gender roles and expectations, attitudes towards the work-wife relationship are also changing. While the Concept is still widely discussed and practised in many workplaces, there is a growing recognition that it can reinforce gender stereotypes and expectations.

There is also a growing awareness of the potential risks associated with the work-wife relationship, particularly in the era of the #MeToo movement. Many workplaces implement policies and guidelines to ensure that these relationships are professional and respectful and that boundaries are maintained between personal and professional life.

At the same time, however, there is also a growing recognition of the importance of emotional support and companionship in the workplace. Many companies now offer employee assistance programmes and mental health support services to help employees cope with the stresses and challenges of modern work life.

Conclusion

The Concept of the work wife in China offers a fascinating insight into the changing gender roles and expectations in Chinese society. While the relationship can provide emotional support and companionship to both parties involved, it also has drawbacks and can reinforce traditional gender stereotypes.

As attitudes towards gender roles evolve and workplace dynamics shift, the Concept of the work wife will likely continue to grow. However, the importance of emotional support and companionship in the workplace will remain the same. Companies and individuals must continue to find ways to support one another professionally and respectfully.

Backlinks

“The Bizarre Relationship of a ‘Work Wife’ and a ‘Work Husband’”, The Atlantic, 8th Feb 2023, https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2023/02/office-relationship-work-wife-husband-term/672974/

“Let’s Stop Talking About ‘Work Spouses’”, Forbes, 13th Feb 2020, https://www.forbes.com/sites/kimelsesser/2020/02/13/lets-stop-talking-about-work-spouses/?sh=5c10e0b76399

“Sorry, boomers, millennials call BS on ‘work wife’ excuse”, New York Post, 4th Apr 2023, https://nypost.com/2023/04/04/sorry-boomers-millennials-call-bs-on-work-wife-excuse/

--

--

Alex Lew, CFA
Alex Lew, CFA

No responses yet